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About Jesus Steve Sweetman
1 Corinthian 7
I
would suggest you read all of 1 Corinthians 7 for yourself because I will
not comment on every verse, only those verses that pertain to the issue at
hand. Paul
didn't address marriage after divorce in this chapter.
What he did address were specific concerns about marriage and
morality the Corinthian Christians wrote him about.
These believers were experiencing a moral crisis in the church.
That's why Paul said, "Now for the matters you wrote about".
(verse 1) So again, as has
been the case throughout this study, we don't have a complete and concise
teaching on this subject in one chapter.
Paul's
underlying presupposition to what he wrote in this chapter was that he
preferred the single life over married life.
The NIV says, "It is good for a man not to marry".
The KJV says, "It is good for a man not to touch a
woman". (verse 1) The
word "marry" in the NIV, or "touch" in the KJV, is
translated from the Greek word "haptomai", meaning, "to
attach to or fasten to". "Haptomai"
was often used in reference to fire fastening itself to something.
Thus, our English words "marry" and "touch"
have an explicit sexual connotation to them, which is reiterated in verse
9 when Paul speaks of "burning with passion".
Continuing
the theme of singleness, Paul went on to say, "It is good for them to
stay unmarried, as I am". (verse 8)
"Those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I
want to spare you this … The time is short.
From now on those who have wives should live as those who have
none". (verses 28 - 29) I
think Paul isn't just speaking of relational "troubles" in verse
28. These troubles might well
have included problems relating to the anti-Christ Roman culture in which
these Christians lived. A man
might have seen his wife raped and whipped for her faith in Jesus.
A wife might have seen her husband executed for his allegiance to
the Lord. Paul would have
hated to see anyone suffer through such troubles.
Even
though Paul preferred being single, he couldn't deny God's original
intention at creation for men and women to be married.
So, concerning married couples he said, "To the married I give
this command … A wife must
not separate from her husband. But
if she does she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her
husband. And a husband must
not divorce his wife". (verses 10 - 11) Paul
understood the fallen nature of humanity.
That's why he inserted the word "but" into his sentence.
"But if she does (divorce) she must remain unmarried or else
be reconciled". Paul
understood what God understood. Men
and women would divorce. That's
why God incorporated divorce into the Law of Moses as seen in Deuteronomy
24:1 – 4. If couples were
going to divorce, then Paul said, "Stay single or else
reconcile". Remaining
single kept the door open for reconciliation.
Marrying another would close that door for good.
Paul was emphasizing permanency in marriage here. "If
any brother who has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to
live with him, he must not divorce her.
And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is
willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife,
and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing
husband". (verses 12 - 14) I
know I'm repeating myself, but Paul was stressing permanency in marriage
here. The fact that your
spouse is an unbeliever isn't Biblical grounds for divorce. Paul
wasn't saying that an unbelieving spouse is saved by the faith of the
believing spouse. The word
"sanctified" means to "set apart".
The unbelieving spouse would be set apart as a blessed person
before the Lord because of the godly life and prayers of the believing
spouse. This might help the
unbeliever come to Jesus. "How
do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband?
Or, how do you know husband, whether you will save your wife"?
(verse 16) "But
if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so.
A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances:
God has called us to live in peace". (verse 15)
If your unbelieving spouse divorces you, just let him or her do so.
Don't put up a fight. Don't
try to win him or her back. Besides,
experience tells me that pleading and begging doesn't work.
It's better to live in peace on your own than to live in turmoil
with an unbeliever. "Let
him do so" means letting go in all aspects of the relationship.
Letting go is vital in finding and maintaining one's personal pace and
sanity through divorce. "A
woman is bound to her husband as long as she lives.
But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes,
but he must belong to the Lord. In
my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is ..."
(verses 39 – 40, also in Romans 7:1 – 2)
Paul preferred widows or widowers to remain single, but he knew
that not all had that ability or gift as he put it in verse 7.
He thus balanced his preference of singleness with God's original
intention for men and women to be married. A
widow or a widower doesn't sin by remarrying, but they must marry someone
who belongs to the Lord.
Previously
I said that I would return to Ezra 10 where we saw Israeli men sending
their pagan wives and the children born to these pagan wives away.
This disturbing decision was meant to demonstrate true repentance
on the part of these Israeli men. Paul
stated in this chapter that a believer must not divorce his or her
unbelieving spouse like the Israeli men did in Ezra 10.
I suggest that Paul was putting a New Covenant spin on an Old
Covenant mindset. Paul
wasn't condoning marrying unbelievers here.
He was simply saying that if for one reason or another you find
yourself in this situation, you should do your best to stay in the
marriage. That being said,
experience also tells me that our best attempts to hang in doesn't
necessarily keep the marriage together.
If that's the case, so be it. We
let go of our spouse and we let go of our marriage. I
know the argument against what I've just said. Nowhere
does Paul condone marriage after divorce in 1 Corinthians 7, and that's
correct. As a matter of fact
he specifically encouraged singleness.
So maybe all that I've written is for naught.
Maybe I've just wasted my time and effort on this project.
I know that those who disagree with me will at least agree with the
suggestion that this has been one colossal waste of time.
Since
Paul didn't specifically address marriage after divorce, we must note all
he said concerning marriage. Once we thoroughly understand what he did
say, we can with all honestly attempt to draw our conclusions to what he
might have thought about marriage after divorce, albeit our conclusions
might be a bit speculative.
Paul
didn’t provide a systematic teaching concerning marriage let alone
marriage after divorce here or anywhere in his writings.
So, we have to admit that we don't know all of what Paul thought on
this subject. In 1 Corinthians
7 he was simply addressing certain concerns the Corinthians had revolving
around immorality in the church. In
the process of addressing these concerns he attempted to balance the
permanency of marriage with his preference of singleness.
I suggest this would have been quite a balancing act for Paul.
He was convinced that singleness was best but he certainly couldn't
deny God's original intention for men and women to be married.
He didn't oppose marriage. "If
anyone thinks he is acting improperly toward the virgin he is engaged to
… he should do as he wants … They
should get married". (verse 36) Paul's
goal in life was to serve Jesus with as little hindrances as possible.
He hoped others would follow his example. "I would like you to
be free from concern. An
unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs – how he can please
the Lord. But a married man is
concerned about the affairs of this world – how he can please his wife
…" (verses 31 - 33) Reducing
one's level of concern for the sake of the Lord was why Paul promoted
singleness over marriage. Paul
understood that not everyone had the gift of singleness. (verse 7)
For that reason he said "that it is better to marry than to
burn with passion". (verse 9) I
suggest that divorced people burn with passion just as much as widows,
widowers, and young single people. I
would also suggest that with great reluctance and hesitancy Paul would
concede that a person who had experienced an unbiblical and unwelcomed
divorce should remarry instead of burning with passion. His
only instruction would be to marry someone who belonged to the Lord.
My
attempt to figure out what Paul would have said about marriage after
divorce won't convince my opponents. That's
okay, because good hermeneutics tells us that we must draw our conclusions
from every Bible passage on this issue, not just from 1 Corinthians 7.
As I've stated earlier, what Jesus said about this issue, as
recorded in the Greek text, permits those who experience an unbiblical and
unwanted divorce to remarry. Such
a divorce does not nullify God's original intention for men and women to
be married, or so I believe. It's
better for them to marry than to burn with passion. Burning
with passion doesn't help anyone to whole heartedly serve the Lord, as was
Paul's ultimate desire for his readers.
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